Limmy’s swear-off

Scottish comedian Limmy has some fun with action film clichés in this short (NSFW) sketch from his superb Limmy’s Show. It mixes familiar ideas, like the escalation of insults, with completely unexpected turns like, well, you’ll see. Let’s just say it gives the phrase bad language a new meaning. Transcript follows below the fold.

The other character’s name isn’t clear, so I’ll call him Paul [McCole, the actor].

Limmy: Drop the gun.

Paul: You drop the gun.

Limmy: Drop the gun… slowly.

Paul: I ain’t droppin’ shit.

Limmy: You wanna do this the old way?

Paul: Let’s do it.

Limmy: Drop the gun… asshole.

Paul: You drop it, pigshit.

Limmy: Drop the gun… dicksplash.

Paul: You drop it, lamewad.

Limmy: Drop the gun, douchebin.

Paul: It’s douchebag, you idiot.

Limmy: Well I say douchebin.

Paul: Well I say drop the gun, douchebag.

Limmy: Drop the gun, you mother…asshole.

Paul: You already said asshole.

Limmy: This time I’m saying mother-asshole.

Paul: You prick.

Limmy: You’re the dick.

Paul: I said prick, not dick.

Limmy: Naw I’m calling you a dick.

Paul: You wank.

Limmy: I’ll wank you, you dick. Shit.

[Limmy winces, closing his eyes. Paul shoots Limmy in the head.]

Limmy: Sheeeeeit.

The fatal line, with its accidentally explicit sexual reference (I’ll wank you, you dick), brings to mind the strangeness of pejorative fucker. Whatever about the abusive sense in referring to someone as a masturbator, faeces, genitals, etc., it seems perverse to insult them by effectively saying they have sex. We’re such douchebins.

[For more linguistic fun from Limmy, albeit non-sweary, see my post on his sketch ‘A muffit of tea’.]

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