Motherfucker—the Samuel L. Jackson of words—is one of the most visceral and satisfying terms in English. It’s pretty much a mother joke in crystalline form and is quite handy when dealing with the kind of motherfuckers you can find anywhere and everywhere on this motherfucking planet.
As with all things fuck-related, Jesse Sheidlower’s The F-Word records variations and euphemisms for motherfucker, such as mammy-dodger, mammy-jammer, maw-dicker, mo dicker, mofo, motherfather, motherfouler, mothergrabber, motherhumper, motherjumper, motherlover, mother-raper, motor cycle, motor flicker, motor scooter, and muh fuh. But even this great collection isn’t complete. Folks like you, me, and deranged lunatics on Twitter keep coining additional variations every day—either to keep it clean or make it creative.
Here are 11 euphemisms for motherfucker from Twitter—still the best Petri dish for unselfconscious, raw language. None of these words are likely to ever make the Oxford English Dictionary, but they are still effective tools for evading censors and getting through the mothersmurfing day.
(Sadly, the example of mothertrumper seems to have no reference to Donald Trump. But don’t let that stop you from using this word to its fullest potential.)
“You motherblesser. Making up your own stories just to make ppl look bad. Motherblesser”
“This badass motherbopper’s gon’ fuck you up look at those eyes maaaan”
“i know everything on account of im a smart genius. however im also a dumbass idiot moron mothercrapper. explain that, science”
“You expletive sucking motherexpletiver!”
“@kirwandavid That is a bad motherfattener…”
“Janelle Monae is FINE as a motherfornicator though.”
“You motherfurniture”
“Congratulations she played you like a motherloser because u a stoopid fart.”
“and its smurfing like a mothersmurfer outside right now”
“-_- Gohan you lying son of a mothertrumper”
“Im a skilled motherwhatever with this handdrill so you best step OFF!! #angryworkday”
Strong Language 
I think ‘motherfurniture”s my favourite…
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A couple of notorious variants that popped up in TV versions of movies: Repo Man…
…and Snakes On A Plane.
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HAHAHAHA!!! thas so funy! nice post
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Repo Man’s director, Alex Cox, was invited to bowdlerize his own movie for TV, and he gladly accepted (reasoning that better him than someone else.) So we have him to thank for ‘melon-farmer’ as well.
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Motherfurniture! I love this!!! XD
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What about motherflippin – as in the motherflppin Hiphopopotomous?
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what is a motherfur
niture?
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Monday to Friday, now that was imaginative.
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We say muthaflikka in our house.
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This is hilarious. Unique post! Keep it up 🙂
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Reblogged this on SEA OF THOUGHTS and commented:
Practically hilarious intermezzo prior to all the serious stuff goin’ on my WordPress timeline. #justwhatineed 😂👌
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Speaking of visceral and satisfying, I have to admit that the combination (though a highly improbable act) of cocksucking motherfucker is tops on my list of really pissed off verbiage. And with a lead in of god damn, each syllable can be slowly spoken, increasing depth of vocal chords and volume of deliver, ending with well enunciated ‘son of a bitch,’ no slurring. Fists should clench, eyeballs should bug out and a previously unnoticed vein in the forehead will swell and throb. A bit like counting to ten before making a regrettable remark.
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Once upon a time, the Playboy 20Q feature was turned over to Samuel L. Jackson, and the first Q was this: “When was the last time you said ‘motherfucker’?”
“Motherfucker,” repeated Mr Jackson, almost as though it were a mantra. And then he smiled, almost beatifically, and added: “Just now.”
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One of my favorites comes from SF writer Jo Clayton, who’s a master of peppering her stories with made-up slang that you just kind of “know what it means” because of the context. Her word is “MOMMAJOGGA.”
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